So my self imposed year of 'dating-so-it-doesn't-matter' is almost up. This was brave new experiment in dating men who were not 'really' available. After an almost 15-year marriage and some serious heartache I decided to only date "Mr. Wrong" as in right for right now- but wrong for future dreams and happily ever after.
It led to some interesting situations. For the most part- anyone who was a candidate for 'riding-off-into-the-sunset' was voted of the island on the first date. And that went well for awhile. I will share tales of 'open' relationships and dating- what a total cluster fuck that has been. Can I just say- don't believe the hype by sista's and brotha's. I have found that those who purport to be the most 'open' are in fact the most conventional and jealous. Lets just say I got my ass kicked in a few ways... Things are not as a they appear.
That said- I have met two really, really nice men - and then there is my ongoing 'situation' with Mumbles that is evolving as some seriously bad mojo got interjected through a door he opened. Things are evolving there. I learned a lot about false appearances and the pettiness and cruelty of jealousy when denied by its holder.
I am less then a month away from possibly exiting my self imposed "don't-take-it-seriously" exile and find myself dating someone who I really like. Its way, way too soon- but I think I like him in that look into the future and smile kind of way... In other words, I have a big crush on someone who is really an appropriate guy to be crushed out on. And, I think, he has a bit of a crush on me as well. I really like him- he is smart, sexy, and nice.
This is my first big crush with an open ended visage since I started dating "the ex" back in the day. Right now, I am just observing and taking it all in.
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