So, a few times in my life... I have gone out with men where there is an electrical current that is not merely about the chemistry of lust and attraction, but about that combined with shared intellectual interests, wack sense of humor, a compulsion to create art, and the ability banter about any and all topics with integrity.
Most of the time its all about frogs. I had pretty much thought there were no more epic love stories available to me- that my mature loves would be short stories of partial meetings. And then, I met someone who knocked me off my axis for awhile- passion, chemistry and shared interests captivated my heart and imagination.
This is "Smitten". Its lovely on many levels to be with him. We are compatible on many, many levels-- ranging from romance to workouts; enjoying quiet meals to creating art; talking about literature to sharing our writings... and there is chemistry!!
However, as I have mentioned- as much as I adore "Smitten" I think at some point I will want more than he wants to offer. At some point, I want that guy who I come home to or at least share 3-4 nights a week with. I am not looking for a baby-daddy, a meal ticket, or a suga' daddy; I am looking for that guy who 'gets me' and is there for me love and be loved by more often than not. I have a lot of that with "Smitten" and he is a delight and fun; however, ultimately, I think I am going to want to share some of daily life even if it is on a part time basis. "Smitten" made it clear that is not his schtick and I totally respect that and love that about him.
It also means that I date.
Right now dating and weekends away; stolen moments; and epic romancing are super satisfying, but I feel a shift towards a quieter style of love and romance. One that entails the dalliances afforded by living or spending routine time together.
All that said, I am growing weary of dating. And after Thursday's date had decided to hang up my heels for a few quiet months of self reflection, double workouts and more studio time. And then... I had an incredible first date on Friday....
Ladies and gentleman- there is more to the story...
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